AI Dating Profile Advice: Helpful Editor or Personality Impostor?
AI can sharpen a dating profile, but it should never invent the person who turns up. Here is how to use profile guidance without losing your voice. [...]
online dating
Beyond “Hi, How Are You?”: First Messages That Actually Start Conversations
A good opening message does not need to be dazzling. It needs to make the other person feel noticed and give them an easy reason to reply. [...]
Dating Profile Verification: What That Badge Does—and Does Not—Tell You
Profile verification can reduce impersonation, but it is not a character reference. Use technology and practical judgement together. [...]
Hot-Take Dating: How Strong Opinions Can Help You Find a Better Match
A thoughtful hot take can rescue a bland dating profile and reveal compatibility—provided confidence never becomes contempt. [...]
Clear-Coding: Why Saying What You Want Is the New Dating Superpower
Clear-coding replaces mixed signals with warm, respectful honesty. Here is how to state what you want without turning a date into an interview. [...]
The Biggest Mistake People Make When Listing Their Dating Standards
If there’s one conversation I’ve had more times than I can count over the years, it’s about dating standards. Whether I’m chatting to someone at one of my speed dating events, answering emails from readers, or simply catching up with friends over coffee, the subject comes up [...]
Are Dating Apps Creating More Choice or More Confusion?
When online dating first became popular, it promised something that seemed almost revolutionary. Instead of relying on chance encounters, introductions from friends, or limited social circles, people could suddenly connect with potential partners from a much wider pool. For many singles, this felt [...]
Why So Many Good Men and Women Are Quietly Giving Up on Dating
As a dating coach, one of the conversations I seem to be having more often than ever before is with genuinely good people who have simply become tired. They are not bitter, angry, or determined to remain single forever. Instead, they have become exhausted by the process of modern dating and have [...]
Why Modern Dating Feels Harder Than Ever
If you’ve spent any time dating over the past few years, you’ve probably had the same thought cross your mind more than once: “Why does this feel so much harder than it used to?” It’s not just you. It’s not bad luck. And it’s definitely not a lack of options. In fact, that’s part of [...]
Why Swiping Isn’t Working and What to Do Instead
If you talk to almost anyone who has spent time on dating apps over the past few years, you will hear a familiar story. At first the experience feels exciting. There are new profiles to explore, conversations to start, and the possibility that the next swipe might lead to someone truly special. For [...]
Why Dating Feels Harder Than It Did 20 Years Ago
Every now and then, when I sit down with someone at a singles event or during a coaching conversation, they say something that makes me smile because I’ve heard it so many times before. They lean in a little, shake their head, and say, “Dating just feels so much harder than it used to.” And [...]
The Limits of Dating Apps in NZ Culture
Dating apps arrived in New Zealand with a promise that felt almost too good to be true. More choice, better matches, convenience, and the ability to meet people outside your usual circles sounded like a breakthrough in a country where social networks can be small and overlapping. For a while, it [...]
Why Dating After 35 Can Feel Misleading
Dating after 35 can feel like you’re playing a game where the rules keep changing and everyone pretends they’re not. The messaging is confusing. One side says, “Never settle, your person is out there.” Another side says, “The good ones are taken.” People swing between hope and cynicism, [...]
The Echo Chamber of Modern Dating Advice
There’s a strange thing happening in dating right now: people aren’t just dating, they’re also constantly “learning how to date” from short, punchy advice online. And some of it is genuinely helpful. But a lot of it isn’t. It’s designed to get clicks, trigger emotion, and keep you [...]
The Top Dating Trends Shaping Romance in 2025
The dating landscape in 2025 is a vibrant mix of authenticity, technology, and intentionality, reflecting how singles are navigating romance in a post-pandemic world. Viral YouTube videos, from relationship coaches to vloggers, highlight trends that are reshaping how we connect. Drawing from recent [...]